• Jul
    6

    Hitting Bottom, Facing Emotional Pain and Getting Help

     

    I’ve been offline for a few days, the result of ongoing homelessness issues (sleeping in my car) and financial stuff. All of that has taken an upswing, the result of a chance meeting and working with TAPS (Together Against Poverty) in Victoria.

    It all started with a referral from my friend Philip, of the YES Group (Young Entrepreneurial Society). As a result I met two people, Charles and Chantelle. This led to a copywriting project (actually an Indiegogo project).

    As it turns out, Charles is intimately familiar with TAPS and encouraged me to call them. The result is that several things have happened.

    I’m now working on an Indiegogo project and a book. With some coaching about mindset from Charles, I was able to work with TAPS who acted as my advocate with obtaining income assistance. With that one change, everything improved.

    Asking for government assistance was something I never wanted to do. It was also one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, mostly because of the stigma of shame and major failure instilled in me at a young age. I was taught to look down on people on welfare, that they were somehow less than.

    To have to ask for help was a huge blow because of the feeling of the utter failure, that I must have seriously f*cked up as human being to reach this place. And yet, here I am. Facing this was one of my worst fears and most humiliating experiences, without a doubt.

    This also ties into my spiritual journey. As Adyashanti states, there are three main phases of the unfoldment: Head, heart and gut. The gut, which where I am, is about life, death and facing one’s worst fears. This is exactly where I am. It’s really difficult at times. And yet, I find myself being pushed through it. Nothing, no matter how difficult, can be avoided. It all must be faced and that’s what’s happening now.

    Now that I’ve hit bottom, I actually feel better.

    As in earlier posts, I want to acknowledge my friends in this: Philip, Charles, Chantelle and Doug. Many thanks to all of you.

    © Nathan Segal 2013

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